Damn you IKEA!!………….(16.09.09)

Posted: 18/10/2010 in ravings of a mad woman

Could it be possible that I have burnt out all my creative outlets? The book is at something of a standstill partly because of the fact that we really need to get the website up and running, partly because I have a distinct lack of “inspiration” and now I fear it may not get off the ground at all. I made the mistake of accompanying Karly to IKEA today and nearly had a stroke when we got to the art department. So many beautiful pictures almost made me want to break down and cry! Needless to say that Karly and Charlene thought it was very funny to watch me shuffle around the racks and racks of images and frames with the biggest grump face you have ever seen, but I was simply smacked in the face by how my massive lack of funds leaves me with a rather large head, full to the brim with fabulous creative and arty ideas with no way of seeing even a small percentage of them come to fruition. Granted I don’t actually NEED any more art as the small gallery in my bedroom has nowhere to go as it is and is simply gathering dust to the point that in just a few short months they will be barely recognisable as creative masterpieces at all. I also now need to find the £900 I’d need to buy a torque converter (the bit that’ s in place of the actual gearbox in an automatic) because daddy dearest made the mistake of showing me the inside of the one he’d spent all day hacking open to use as a teaching aid for all his fresh new apprentices. It is truly a thing of beauty! From the outside it doesn’t exactly look like much, if fact I found it to resemble slightly one of the alien flying saucer things from “Batteries not Included”; but on the inside it is shiny and mean looking but also geometrically perfect with a fan of gill looking pieces. I only want the top half really though so if someone wants to go halves with me and have the bottom half that’s fine by me! Quite what I’d do with it I’m not entirely sure as it is more than a little bit heavy so I wouldn’t realistically be able to hang it on a wall, but I’m sure, as resourceful as I am, I’d be able to find somewhere to display it. I should probably try and finish some of the masses of stated paintings I have but for some illogical reason the only kind of art I feel the urge to create right now would involve crayons and chalk and a large chunk of pavement. Why is it that people seem to think you’re crazy if you choose to creatively express yourself with good old fashioned wax? Is it really only the reserve of children and crazy people? Maybe I fit into both categories so it’s not too bad I suppose. I have a vast selection of what I consider to be beautiful photographs that I’d love to get put onto canvas, if only I had the money. Of course I can do it myself what with my magical, mystical heat press, but I would still have to find the funds to purchase the canvases, or the bits needed to build frames as I already have quite a lot of canvas in the “Park Road Fabric Stores” as my mother likes to refer to the wardrobe in the studio! Maybe I should go on Dragons Den or something and try and get some funding?! Yeah, that’s really going to work. Selling my own images on handmade frames on eBay is really going to make me my fortune! I might just have to see if dear sweet darling mother (otherwise known as parental unit number one) will front me the money for a few canvases and I’ll just have to prove my worth and ability to take apart and replace the fabrics on the frames without monkeying it too much to be able to sell them on. Maybe I’ll just have to drink far too much coffee and go back to the finger painting modern art for the modern interior.


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